Translated (Indonesian-English) by Leni Marlina
–
/1/
At the Threshold of the Door You Never Open
Poem by Dikdik Sadikin
Between two breaking seconds,
I learned that love sometimes chooses
to become a quiet blade—
one that slips in
without the courtesy of sound.
You must know this:
I am only a sliver of shadow
waiting to be grazed
by the dimness you call your own.
Let me remain a word
you erase before it is ever read,
or a small ember
you extinguish before it dares to bloom—
so long as your warmth
still wanders through my blood.
There are nights
when my heart becomes a tiny hospital
whose lights refuse to sleep,
guarding the faintest pulse
only because your name
still drifts through its corridors.
And should the day arrive
when you leave,
ah—how silence will creep
into the seams of my bones,
teaching grief
to stand without trembling.
I could bow to fate,
steal a little hope from the air,
so long as I may feel
the warmth of your body
pressing against my chest
just once—
like a prayer suspended,
never reaching its amen.
Look—
on my knees, the dust of longing
never dries.
In my voice, a door remains
forever open for you,
even as you shutter
all the mornings inside me.
What I ask is simple,
yet bottomless:
love me.
Love me—
even from afar,
even with the bitterness you carry,
even with your leaving
as your only companion.
Bogor, West Java, Indonesia, November 26th, 2025
/2/
Between the Footsteps That Drift Away
Poem by Dikdik Sadikin
Translated (Indonesian- English) by
Leni Marlina
I left before the rain had finished falling.
On that wet road, every drop that touched the earth
seemed to write your name upon the ground
only to erase it in the same breath.
I knew that if I stayed,
I would become nothing more
than a stone in the current of your life—
an obstacle keeping your river
from finding its sea.
So I walked away,
yet your shadow clung to the air
like the scent of rain
that refuses to subside.
Once, we were two lights
caught in the same mirror—
igniting each other
even as we burned.
Now I carry only the residue of that fire
in a chest gone cold,
a memory both sweet and stinging,
like sugar on a wounded lip.
Beloved, do not mourn this parting.
I was never the home your dreams needed—
only a window you opened briefly
before morning arrived.
You require wider air,
not a silhouette lingering
behind your curtains.
In these receding footprints,
I learn the art
of loving you without holding you.
Love, it seems, does not need possession
in order to live.
It needs only remembrance
to keep breathing.
And in every breath,
I still love you—
in a way without sound,
without touch,
yet infinite.
May the world treat you gently,
as sunlight touches
the youngest tips of leaves.
May you find all that you once sought,
and when you lift your gaze to the sky
some quiet evening,
perhaps, unknowingly,
you will remember someone
who once walked away
while loving you
with all the silence he had.
For love, like prayer,
never truly ends.
It merely changes shape—
becoming wind,
becoming light,
becoming footsteps
fading into distance,
whispering softly:
I will always love you.
Bogor, West Java, Indonesia, November 28th, 2025
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About the Poet: Dikdik Sadikin
Writer | Accountant | Former Director of Human Resource and Cultural Development Oversight
Dikdik Sadikin is a multidimensional professional whose career seamlessly weaves together the disciplines of finance, governance, and literary expression. With a distinguished background as an accountant and former Director of Human Resource and Cultural Development Oversight, he has been instrumental in fortifying institutional integrity and cultivating robust human capital within the public sector.
Beyond his administrative and governance roles, Dikdik emerges as a writer of uncommon depth and precision. His tenure leading an oversight-oriented publication showcased his ability to curate discourse with analytical acuity, narrative clarity, and a discerning editorial sensibility—qualities that elevate conversations on governance, ethics, and accountability.
As an active contributor to a range of national platforms, he continues to articulate his insights through short stories, poetry, and reflective essays. His writing is marked by a rare synthesis of intellectual rigor and creative imagination, capturing the intricacies of the human condition while steadfastly embodying the principles of professional ethics and responsible civic engagement.
