Hole of Thought

Yusuf Achmad

I remember praying in congregation at the Ampel mosque,
The rosary beads spinning in my hand, vibrating with the chants of the congregation.
I gaze at the imam standing tall in front, his eyes fixed on the mihrab,
My thoughts flow swiftly, filling every crevice in that mihrab.

Stories of Mbah Bolong tempt the gaps in the buttons of the congregation,
The cavity of the kemuncing greets, dust settles on the holy book.
Cracks in some letters, seep into thoughts and bald spots,
In the crevice of the cracked box, Mbah Bolong reminds me of my friend’s void.

A brown crevice in his heart cavity, a sign of a void in the soul,
A gap in love that is never empty or hollow, unseen by my eyes.
Only that mihrab crevice, that brings my body and soul right there,
Above the Kaaba’s hole, Mbah Bolong, you burrowed into my thoughts, is there any hole that is not a hole?

Oh Mbah Bolong reminds me of the hole in my wife’s heart,
Like a hole that never closes, my thoughts keep flowing,
Searching for answers in every crevice that exists.
The hole of Mbah Bolong, a symbol of endless searching,
Bringing my thoughts to soar, grasping the meaning behind the emptiness.

Surabaya, 4-11-2023